that feeling when you told someone about a book or a movie or an artist or a show and they tried to keep putting it off and putting it off and when they finally indulge in it they fucking love it and you’re like
I am writing this for all the people that are thinking of committing suicide so please read.
On Tuesday 13th March I made an impulse decision to end my life, I overdosed on paracetamol at 10:30pm. I ended up in hospital because I got so ill, I was in excruciating pain but I felt like I had to pretend I wasn’t because my family were there sitting beside me and I never felt so guilty, I wanted to make sure they thought I was okay because it broke my heart to see them that way. I was put on a drip for a couple of days, and it was horrible, I wasn’t able to sleep because I kept having nurses and doctors checking on me and taking my blood, and the line from the drip didn’t allow me to move my arm. Everytime I moved I threw up, and because I had to drink chalk in the ambulance it meant that it was extremely painful and black, until they pumped me with more drugs which sent me to sleep. I quite quickly recovered and got to go home, but what I’m trying to say is that if you’re thinking of overdosing DON’T you won’t die, you’ll just be in pain for ages then and afterwards. I’m still struggling to walk and my stomach and liver hurt so much, so I have to deal with all the questions and lie to my best friends about what happened, so I don’t have to see the hurt in their eyes like I did in my families. I will never forget the cry I heard from my sisters room. It still haunts me, and will forever. So please think before you do anything. People care. I care, and I’m always here for anyone.
In the first picture I was so weak I couldn’t even talk, I couldn’t move and it was hard to breathe. I have to admit that it was really scary and I dont want anyone else to go through that.
(I’m sorry if some of my friends have found out about this over here, but I would really appreciate it if you kept it on tumblr and no one else found out…thank you)
This happened on my birthday. I knew there was a reason I wasn’t enjoying my day.